With Halloween on the way, and inspired by Joss’s punning chocolate post, here’s my spooky tale based on streets and placenames around the UK. (Apologies in advance. I got carried away. I’m sorry. So very, very sorry.)

(original lightning pic: istock:nature_247)

Dead Lane

Are you sitting comfortably? Then I’ll begin…

‘Twas the night of AllHallows.

Rain(ham) was lashing down and the Thunder(sley) rolled as I walked towards home.

Suddenly lightning flashed, and I spied a Black Dog. It let out a bloodcurdling Howl(ey) and turned towards me, eyes flashing Red(hill) and jaws slavering as if it had Rabies (Heath Road).

Unwilling to be a Lamb(eth) to the (Lower) Slaughter I turned tail and ran back along Gibbet Street.

Panting for breath I leaned against a wooden post which creaked ominously. Looking up, I screamed.

For I had unwittingly run onto Gallows Green, and the corpse of the notorious highwayman ‘Black Bourton‘ was swinging towards me on the Gibbet (Lane), his fleshless Skull (House Lane) grinning.

In blind panic I fled along the Hangman Path and into the Woodlands, wherein lurks the Goole. Legend tells of how it lures unwary travellers into its Crypt (Estate) and feasts on their Brains (Green).

Fortunately, I escaped unscathed but then, stumbling into the graveyard, I fell headlong into an open Grave(send), and landed on top of a Coffin(swell).

Laying there, winded, my blood froze as the coffin creaked open and a pale Hand(cross) groped towards me. The Dead (Lane) were rising!

Scrambling out of the Grave(ny), I ran towards a nearby cottage, and witless with terror hammered at the door.

It finally creaked open and, to my Horra(bridge), I was face to face with the Witch(am)!

My overwhelmed senses finally gave in and, as I slipped into a dead faint, the last thing I heard was the Witch (Close), as she cackled…

“Happy Halloween!!”

Related Tags: Dog, Coffin, Dead, Skull, Horror, General, Halloween, Grave, Witch, Gibbet

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